I have news to report on the dissertation end. Back in February I actually wrote up a draft of a proposal. I felt as though I turned a corner and was actually entering the Piled High and Deep world eager and ready. But, hold on, don't get too excited. Real life reared it's ugly head. I got a phone call the beginning of March telling me Mom was "on her way to Heaven". So up to Boston I flew. We took her off all her meds. We were told to prepare for death. Mom had stopped eating and drinking. But in Mom's usual dramatic diva-like way (and in God's I-know-better-than-you-mere-mortals way) Mom came back to life off the meds. I always knew Mom was over medicated. Now, God decided to back me up. That's why I like Him. :) Now if only other mere mortals (especially the ones who wear white coats and scrubs) would get out of His way and let Him to do some work, we might be able to get Mom's meds figured out.
And recently they put Mom in a new chair that she can get herself out of and she fell twice in 24 hours and ended up in the hospital last week. On the way to the hospital the ambulance got in an accident and they had to call an ambulance for the guy who hit them and then call an ambulance to switch over to. I can't make this stuff up, folks.
Anyway, they discovered Mom had no fractures (thank God) and that she had another UTI, which by the way, I told everyone she had for two weeks but no one seemed to hear me. I think I should just start calling myself Dr. MAM and not even bother waiting for the final PhD degree. I bet if I told everyone I was Dr. MAM people would listen better.
Mom came home from the hospital this past Monday. She had 4 real good days, one horrible day, one great day, and a pretty good day today. Mom likes to spit out her meds, which I cannot blame her for. In the hospital she gets an Iv, so no spitting. Where she lives they crush it up into ice cream or applesauce. The crusher they use is horrible. It doesn't crush the dreaded chemicals into dust. Who likes to taste and try to swallow chunks? Not me! I have watched Mom try to take those dang meds and it is not pleasant. Makes me think she's not getting her correct dose, which is why I have a feeling we are not through with this UTI, which by the way the doctor said was a very unusual bacteria. LOL. Of course it is. And they put Mom back in the chair she can get out of. So, I know, it is only a matter of time before she falls again. I just about give up. And the Hippa rules, etc, make it impossible to truly protect someone like Mom. A secure belt for her own safety is considered a restraint. So instead we just risk having her fall and fracture herself, and possibly need surgery, which would mean more anesthesia, which is how we ended up here in the first place. Whatever. Other than that, Mom is in one of the best places an old person can be in. What a nightmare it must be if you are in a bad place. Ugh. Mom has some great people around her. So for that I'm grateful. Some kindhearted CNA's, nurses, and volunteers paint her nails, put her makeup on, dress her the way she likes to dress, and keep her entertained.
I'm so drained. I cried all day Friday and could not sleep Friday night. I worry sick over Mom falling out of this new chair. It's just crazy. What good is this chair if she hurts herself? Makes no sense to me. This whole past year, no matter what happened, I could deal with it. I hardly ever cried. But this chair freaks me out. It already has proven (twice) it's an accident waiting to happen. Oh, well. Hope Mom's guardian angel isn't old and feeble like she is. Because he or she needs lots of energy to keep up with Mom.
Hmmm, maybe I'll get back to the proposal I started in February. Maybe I wont.
Mom's a trooper. UTI's make her lose her mind. I said to her on the phone before she went to the hospital, "You're having a hard day, aren't you?" Mom said, "Yes, yes, yes, Oh God, oh God, oh God! But it's ok , dear. I'm learning to be courageous." Then yesterday on the phone I said, "Sometimes I cry because I know how hard this is for you. I worry" She said,"Oh, sweetheart, I don't want you to suffer because of me ... although it does give me a good feeling. But I really don't want you to suffer even though it does make me happy." LOL
I went to a healing service today to pray for Mom and myself. I'm either going to have a nervous breakdown or an ulcer by the time my trip to dementia world ends. The man who prayed over me told me that his mother went through the same thing. Practically identical stories--his mother came back to life after being taken off meds--one UTI after another--hell of a time getting meds figured out. While we were praying for Mom, my brother, one of the nuns, and a volunteer took my mother outside for the passing Memorial Day Parade. Mom was all excited and happy and talking to EVERYONE. LOL Mom always was a social butterfly. Mom turned 87 this past Thursday. No one thought she would live to see another birthday. Last year at the parade, she stood proudly and saluted perfectly the way an ex-Marine should as the Marines passed by. The Marines saw her and stopped to salute her. Today she couldn't stand but I'm sure she sat TALL in that awful new chair and saluted with pride. Once a Marine, always a Marine. Semper Fi, Mom!
For now, I shall leave you with some pics of my trip to see Mom in March. You can see the remarkable difference in her from day 1 to day 7. Moral of this story is don't over medicate your elders.
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